Writer’s Note: My brother, Gary, passed away this week and after writing his eulogy, I have had little emotional energy to write anything else. So, today, I post something from my personal Dear God Journals. It’s a personal conversation on purpose, a dialog, if you will, between me and Thee. May we all find peace and purpose today and in the coming days. Amen and Ehmen.
Today, while looking for the scripture that said “Praise God from who all blessings flow,” I realized that, while based on biblical truths, it is not a verbatim scripture from the Bible at all; but is instead from a song written in 1551. Then, I realized that God did not stop when he completed the 1,189 chapters, 31,173 verses, or 807,361 words in …the Bible. Nor did He stop with the parables of the Gospels or when He inspired that old gospel hymn. God still, today, has things to say and as long as we keep our eyes, ears and hearts tuned to Him, we will still see His words and teachings all around us; a continuous flow of comfort, restoration and salvation for those yet wandering in the desert on the fringe of the Promised Land.
From there, my mind wandered to purpose. Probably because that is the topic of study coming up at my church and is something that has been pounding me personally over the head for the past several weeks. I began to ponder how God hasn’t stopped utilizing plain ol’ everyday sinners for His purposes and that I, like all of us, have been purposed and given the gifts to fulfill that purpose. About three years ago, when God opened my eyes to my own purpose., it was like seeing Jesus standing on the water, calling to me, my purpose in His hand. But, while relieved to finally know what my purpose was, I must admit that I did not fully embrace it and have allowed fear and life’s everyday obstacles to get in the way. It has been an on-again, off-again affair, to say the least.
I desperately want to be like Peter who trusts Him enough to step out of the boat. Sure, Peter sank, but I know in my heart of hearts that just proves that it’s ok to be human and that God’s grace and hand will always be there to save us. Not being able to do something on our own does not make us a failure at all, but instead it is this realization through which we gain eternal life. Truly, we have nothing to lose, but everything to gain by keeping our eyes locked on Jesus and for repeatedly stepping out of that boat, our purpose in hand.
And, just as I punctuated that last thought, I heard that small, still voice whispering softly to my spirit:
“Don’t you get it, My child? You know in your heart that I want you to write; that is My purpose for you. Need an aha moment? Here it is. That poor memory I gave you was never intended as an obstacle. Instead it has taught you the habit of writing things down; things that were not meant just for you. Keep writing, my child. Words are powerful. I used them to create the world and I still use them to reach my many lost and wandering children who, like you, tend to forget that I am here to save them. You, My daughter, are like a pen through which My ink wants to flow. As long as you allow Me to be the one that clicks the button that locks the ink reservoir in place, My everlasting ink will flow through you so that you can do your part to fulfill My purposes. Keep writing, my child, and leave the rest to Me.”
Enough said. Thank you for choosing me, Lord. Please help me to be one of the most used, most reliable pens in your arsenal. Forever and ever. Amen and Ehmen,